Newborn Sleep + Sleep Training
A hot topic! Newborn sleep is soooo talked about, everywhere, but this video is all about new newborn sleep. The first three months, where I know my expertise lies, is all about recognizing that your baby is still transitioning to life outside the womb, where they’re still learning whether or not they can trust you, and the only work that really matters is creating a secure attachment and sleep training before 12 weeks does not accomplish that. However, training parents on how to help their newborns sleep does – so I promise this is not going to be a wild free-for-all where your baby doesn’t sleep for three months, I wouldn’t do that to you. In fact, stick with me and you will likely be pleasantly surprised.
So yes, it is absolutely important to practice good sleep hygiene and it is important to find a way that everyone can rest and feel good about how, when, and where sleep is happening but babies don’t even begin to develop a circadian rhythm until 3 months. Plus, even sleep trainers say that you can’t start training until four to five months, and trying to sleep training earlier does not at all equal success because babies simply aren’t ready. However! I find when folks lean into following baby’s rhythm and understanding their needs, they don’t even really need to sleep train anyway... More on that in a hot second.
So, to give some context to sleep, let’s compare an adult’s and a newborn’s sleep. An adult’s sleep cycle lasts around four hours and we typically can sleep for up to eight hour stretches, for a total of 8 hours of sleep a day aka all consolidated overnight. Of course right now for you this might not be happening because pregnancy pee-breaks are not included in this equation but in general it’s a six to eight hour stretch and stirring somewhere in the middle. At 2am, or whenever that halfway point is, we enter into a lighter sleep and that’s when we’re most likely to be woken up by noises, hunger, partners moving, uncomfortable temperatures, nightmares, the list goes on. Newborns, however, are on twenty to fifty minute cycles so after that time, they enter a lighter sleep and often stir. Just like us, they can be easily woken by noises, hunger, movement, uncomfortable temperatures so that’s why there are things we can do to encourage longer stretches of sleep but their cycles are short and fragile and newborns simply wake up. They also need to eat every 2.5-3 hours, so it is likely they will wake up after 2-3 cycles looking for food.
Now, adults can link those 4-hour sleep cycles and extend to 8 or 12, like me, but babies, especially itty bitty babies, can’t because they physiologically need to eat at some point overnight. In the womb, they could wake and sleep as they pleased, no care or even awareness of being on a schedule so remember that that’s the environment they’re coming from. And think, you as an adult, do you *want* to be stirring at 2am? Do you want to be waking up or would you prefer long, restful sleeps? Newborns are the same. They’d much rather be sleeping but they get hungry and are wise enough to know that they need to wake up to feed to function. So If your baby wakes up and is cueing for food, trust them! Especially if they’re hitting that 2.5-3 hour mark because they’re not designed to stretch longer than that more than once a day.
To manage expectations, a baby needs to feed 8 times a day. Physiologically, we know that a baby in weeks 1, 2, 3, 4 can safely go 4 hours between feeds once a day – which means the rest of the feeds need to be between 2-5-3 hours apart. And every week after that, is the number of hours that it would be *safe* for a baby to sleep. So a six weeker could sleep six hours, a 10 weeker could sleep 10 hours, but whether or not they do is a totally other thing. Did baby have enough sleep during the day? Did they feed enough during the day? Did they have too much stimulation during the day? Days affect nights and there are so many variables. All of that is to say, remember, the first 12 weeks is not about sleep training. It’s about sleep hygiene. And what does that look like?
Dark rooms, consistency, white noise, a good swaddle, having them sleep in their own space if and when they will, are all great ‘sleep hygiene practices’. Feed no sooner than 2 hours during the day, no later than 3 hours – feeding from 2.5-3 hours during the day between 6am and 10pm is how we get in those 7 feeds, and then we get that long juicy stretch overnight.
Take cues from baby and let them rest when they’re tired rather than risk an overwhelmed or irritable newborn who will be much more difficult to put down but also know that consistency does not mean regularity or predictability; things can and will change from one day to the next, and they will have a huge developmental leap at three months anyway which some families feel like ‘mess up’ all the sleep training work they had done; huge myth. Developmental leaps don’t ‘mess’ anything up, they’re a great sign of healthy physiological and neurological development.
Be sure to watch the videos on Newborn Leaps, Newborn Feeding Schedules + Newborn Wake Windows because that is all crucial information about sleep + routines in the first 12 weeks.
Sleep is something we’ll chat about before the birth and LOTS after the birth, so remember that I’m here as a live resource, I’ve personally had tons of success with wicked day and double wicked night sleep and I will help you every step of the way.
Text or call! Chat soon
A hot topic! Newborn sleep is soooo talked about, everywhere, but this video is all about new newborn sleep. The first three months, where I know my expertise lies, is all about recognizing that your baby is still transitioning to life outside the womb, where they’re still learning whether or not they can trust you, and the only work that really matters is creating a secure attachment and sleep training before 12 weeks does not accomplish that. However, training parents on how to help their newborns sleep does – so I promise this is not going to be a wild free-for-all where your baby doesn’t sleep for three months, I wouldn’t do that to you. In fact, stick with me and you will likely be pleasantly surprised.
So yes, it is absolutely important to practice good sleep hygiene and it is important to find a way that everyone can rest and feel good about how, when, and where sleep is happening but babies don’t even begin to develop a circadian rhythm until 3 months. Plus, even sleep trainers say that you can’t start training until four to five months, and trying to sleep training earlier does not at all equal success because babies simply aren’t ready. However! I find when folks lean into following baby’s rhythm and understanding their needs, they don’t even really need to sleep train anyway... More on that in a hot second.
So, to give some context to sleep, let’s compare an adult’s and a newborn’s sleep. An adult’s sleep cycle lasts around four hours and we typically can sleep for up to eight hour stretches, for a total of 8 hours of sleep a day aka all consolidated overnight. Of course right now for you this might not be happening because pregnancy pee-breaks are not included in this equation but in general it’s a six to eight hour stretch and stirring somewhere in the middle. At 2am, or whenever that halfway point is, we enter into a lighter sleep and that’s when we’re most likely to be woken up by noises, hunger, partners moving, uncomfortable temperatures, nightmares, the list goes on. Newborns, however, are on twenty to fifty minute cycles so after that time, they enter a lighter sleep and often stir. Just like us, they can be easily woken by noises, hunger, movement, uncomfortable temperatures so that’s why there are things we can do to encourage longer stretches of sleep but their cycles are short and fragile and newborns simply wake up. They also need to eat every 2.5-3 hours, so it is likely they will wake up after 2-3 cycles looking for food.
Now, adults can link those 4-hour sleep cycles and extend to 8 or 12, like me, but babies, especially itty bitty babies, can’t because they physiologically need to eat at some point overnight. In the womb, they could wake and sleep as they pleased, no care or even awareness of being on a schedule so remember that that’s the environment they’re coming from. And think, you as an adult, do you *want* to be stirring at 2am? Do you want to be waking up or would you prefer long, restful sleeps? Newborns are the same. They’d much rather be sleeping but they get hungry and are wise enough to know that they need to wake up to feed to function. So If your baby wakes up and is cueing for food, trust them! Especially if they’re hitting that 2.5-3 hour mark because they’re not designed to stretch longer than that more than once a day.
To manage expectations, a baby needs to feed 8 times a day. Physiologically, we know that a baby in weeks 1, 2, 3, 4 can safely go 4 hours between feeds once a day – which means the rest of the feeds need to be between 2-5-3 hours apart. And every week after that, is the number of hours that it would be *safe* for a baby to sleep. So a six weeker could sleep six hours, a 10 weeker could sleep 10 hours, but whether or not they do is a totally other thing. Did baby have enough sleep during the day? Did they feed enough during the day? Did they have too much stimulation during the day? Days affect nights and there are so many variables. All of that is to say, remember, the first 12 weeks is not about sleep training. It’s about sleep hygiene. And what does that look like?
Dark rooms, consistency, white noise, a good swaddle, having them sleep in their own space if and when they will, are all great ‘sleep hygiene practices’. Feed no sooner than 2 hours during the day, no later than 3 hours – feeding from 2.5-3 hours during the day between 6am and 10pm is how we get in those 7 feeds, and then we get that long juicy stretch overnight.
Take cues from baby and let them rest when they’re tired rather than risk an overwhelmed or irritable newborn who will be much more difficult to put down but also know that consistency does not mean regularity or predictability; things can and will change from one day to the next, and they will have a huge developmental leap at three months anyway which some families feel like ‘mess up’ all the sleep training work they had done; huge myth. Developmental leaps don’t ‘mess’ anything up, they’re a great sign of healthy physiological and neurological development.
Be sure to watch the videos on Newborn Leaps, Newborn Feeding Schedules + Newborn Wake Windows because that is all crucial information about sleep + routines in the first 12 weeks.
Sleep is something we’ll chat about before the birth and LOTS after the birth, so remember that I’m here as a live resource, I’ve personally had tons of success with wicked day and double wicked night sleep and I will help you every step of the way.
Text or call! Chat soon