Ritual + Meditation
Ritual and meditation are two of my favourite tools for pregnancy, labour and the postpartum period. They are so incredibly undervalued, underrated and thus underused but can make a massive impact on how the day flows, how the day feels and also our general well-being.
Ritual by definition is doing something special in a certain, set way. It tends to be a daily, repetitive practice and there might even be notes of reverence or contemplation involved. For example, for some their morning coffee or tea involves a ritual. Ritual is preparing the coffee a certain way, at a certain time, to be enjoyed in a certain spot or in a certain mug. For others going to the gym is part of their daily ritual - certain classes at certain times with certain teachers. We follow rituals when we choose to go home the exact same way at the exact same time every day, and some of us even have certain bedtime rituals that we have naturally fallen into over the years or were instilled into us as children.
Meditation, by definition, is the practice of turning inwards to focus, think deeply or turn off the outside world. It stereotypically is portrayed as sitting cross-legged, eyes closed, back straight and hands in a sort of yogic mudra. Meditation is also the art of becoming hyper aware about what’s going on inside while remaining connected to and aware of what’s going on in the environment. Even if you don’t consider yourself to be a meditator, you probably do it much more often than you think. That intense focus at work when you’re in the zone, during a kick-ass workout class or on a long run, staring into the water or fire at the cottage, savouring delicious food, or those quiet moments on weekend mornings between waking and getting up... those are all examples of daily meditation when we’re present with ourselves, totally in-tune with what’s going on in our heads and hearts but also present in the world.
So how does this all fit into pregnancy, labour and the postpartum?
Being able to tap into the power of ritual and meditation will absolutely impact the outcome of labour but the only way to tap into it is to practice it. In labour, you will be getting contractions. They will come every 10, 8, 6, 4, 3, 2 minutes and will last for 30, 40, 50, 60, 70 seconds each. This repetitive, wave-like contraction pattern is a ritual in and of itself and the contraction will force you to meditate. It will force you to turn inwards, face what’s going on in your mind while still being intensely aware of the sounds and sensations around you. I can absolutely guarantee that this is going to happen. Even if it’s not contractions, it’s anxiously awaiting a phone call for the induction. It’s a nurse messing up your IV three times and having to call someone else to do it. It’s all that time on mat leave when you thought you’d have lots to do when you’re chewing down your fingernails watching Netflix instead.
The postpartum period also absolutely will require ritual and meditation as well. You will need your own rituals to stay grounded, things to do before your partner leaves for work in the morning to help you get ready for the day, the rhythmic rocking, walking and swaying of a fussy baby, finding your center when your baby is screaming bloody murder and you don’t know why, being able to clear your mind of judgements, anxieties, worries when you need and listen to find your intuition about all things related to parenthood and relationships with loved ones.
Now, what are my suggestions for rituals to start in labour and postpartum? I’d highly suggest first identifying all of the rituals that you do and love in your daily life already. This is really important because you’re going to want to choose a few and promise yourself that you’ll maintain them. For some people that’s a daily hot shower and a full-body lotion. For others that’s washing their face at night and putting on their favourite night cream. It might be a smoothie for breakfast, opening the windows in the morning and putting on the diffuser, or having a late afternoon sweet. Identify them, share what they are with your partner or close friends, and vow to keep them after baby’s home. The reason why I suggest sharing it with your partner or friend is so that they can help keep you accountable and they’ll make those things come true. Imagine hearing, “Hey honey, go take a shower and enjoy your lotion. Don’t worry about us, we’re good here,” or “Hey girl, did you have your sweet treat this afternoon? Let me get you something if you haven’t yet.” What would that feel like? Pretty great, right? Your rituals are imperative for staying grounded, present, and feeling valued and remembered -- and you’re the only one who can make these rituals actually happen even though your support system can definitely help.
With meditation, if you’ve got a practice then I’d suggest incorporating walking meditation if you don’t already do that and also getting used to shorter windows of meditation at more frequent intervals. Maybe you’re used to 30 minute sits once or twice a day, but practice getting into that space ten or fifteen times a day for 2 to 3 minutes each. You probably won’t have an uninterrupted 30 minutes, both outside and inside, for a while but you absolutely can find a couple minutes lots of moments throughout the day. If you don’t have a meditation practice, I’ve included a couple resources below to get you started. There are a few Spotify playlists with guided meditations, some youtube videos on breath meditation, a couple articles on mindfulness and other goodies. If you decide that you want to do this, please reach out so I can offer you some personalized suggestions based on where you’re at, what your goals are and how you feel about the whole meditation thing.
Take a moment right now to reflect on your rituals, and when you’re ready, please fill out the fill-able pdf below and send it to me so I have an idea of where you’re at and how I can help.
Ritual and meditation are two of my favourite tools for pregnancy, labour and the postpartum period. They are so incredibly undervalued, underrated and thus underused but can make a massive impact on how the day flows, how the day feels and also our general well-being.
Ritual by definition is doing something special in a certain, set way. It tends to be a daily, repetitive practice and there might even be notes of reverence or contemplation involved. For example, for some their morning coffee or tea involves a ritual. Ritual is preparing the coffee a certain way, at a certain time, to be enjoyed in a certain spot or in a certain mug. For others going to the gym is part of their daily ritual - certain classes at certain times with certain teachers. We follow rituals when we choose to go home the exact same way at the exact same time every day, and some of us even have certain bedtime rituals that we have naturally fallen into over the years or were instilled into us as children.
Meditation, by definition, is the practice of turning inwards to focus, think deeply or turn off the outside world. It stereotypically is portrayed as sitting cross-legged, eyes closed, back straight and hands in a sort of yogic mudra. Meditation is also the art of becoming hyper aware about what’s going on inside while remaining connected to and aware of what’s going on in the environment. Even if you don’t consider yourself to be a meditator, you probably do it much more often than you think. That intense focus at work when you’re in the zone, during a kick-ass workout class or on a long run, staring into the water or fire at the cottage, savouring delicious food, or those quiet moments on weekend mornings between waking and getting up... those are all examples of daily meditation when we’re present with ourselves, totally in-tune with what’s going on in our heads and hearts but also present in the world.
So how does this all fit into pregnancy, labour and the postpartum?
Being able to tap into the power of ritual and meditation will absolutely impact the outcome of labour but the only way to tap into it is to practice it. In labour, you will be getting contractions. They will come every 10, 8, 6, 4, 3, 2 minutes and will last for 30, 40, 50, 60, 70 seconds each. This repetitive, wave-like contraction pattern is a ritual in and of itself and the contraction will force you to meditate. It will force you to turn inwards, face what’s going on in your mind while still being intensely aware of the sounds and sensations around you. I can absolutely guarantee that this is going to happen. Even if it’s not contractions, it’s anxiously awaiting a phone call for the induction. It’s a nurse messing up your IV three times and having to call someone else to do it. It’s all that time on mat leave when you thought you’d have lots to do when you’re chewing down your fingernails watching Netflix instead.
The postpartum period also absolutely will require ritual and meditation as well. You will need your own rituals to stay grounded, things to do before your partner leaves for work in the morning to help you get ready for the day, the rhythmic rocking, walking and swaying of a fussy baby, finding your center when your baby is screaming bloody murder and you don’t know why, being able to clear your mind of judgements, anxieties, worries when you need and listen to find your intuition about all things related to parenthood and relationships with loved ones.
Now, what are my suggestions for rituals to start in labour and postpartum? I’d highly suggest first identifying all of the rituals that you do and love in your daily life already. This is really important because you’re going to want to choose a few and promise yourself that you’ll maintain them. For some people that’s a daily hot shower and a full-body lotion. For others that’s washing their face at night and putting on their favourite night cream. It might be a smoothie for breakfast, opening the windows in the morning and putting on the diffuser, or having a late afternoon sweet. Identify them, share what they are with your partner or close friends, and vow to keep them after baby’s home. The reason why I suggest sharing it with your partner or friend is so that they can help keep you accountable and they’ll make those things come true. Imagine hearing, “Hey honey, go take a shower and enjoy your lotion. Don’t worry about us, we’re good here,” or “Hey girl, did you have your sweet treat this afternoon? Let me get you something if you haven’t yet.” What would that feel like? Pretty great, right? Your rituals are imperative for staying grounded, present, and feeling valued and remembered -- and you’re the only one who can make these rituals actually happen even though your support system can definitely help.
With meditation, if you’ve got a practice then I’d suggest incorporating walking meditation if you don’t already do that and also getting used to shorter windows of meditation at more frequent intervals. Maybe you’re used to 30 minute sits once or twice a day, but practice getting into that space ten or fifteen times a day for 2 to 3 minutes each. You probably won’t have an uninterrupted 30 minutes, both outside and inside, for a while but you absolutely can find a couple minutes lots of moments throughout the day. If you don’t have a meditation practice, I’ve included a couple resources below to get you started. There are a few Spotify playlists with guided meditations, some youtube videos on breath meditation, a couple articles on mindfulness and other goodies. If you decide that you want to do this, please reach out so I can offer you some personalized suggestions based on where you’re at, what your goals are and how you feel about the whole meditation thing.
Take a moment right now to reflect on your rituals, and when you’re ready, please fill out the fill-able pdf below and send it to me so I have an idea of where you’re at and how I can help.